I remember growing up and one of my sisters would always comment (complain) about being the middle child. I was one of the oldest, and the oldest girl, so I really thought she was just being silly. Now that I have my own middle child I can already see where my dear Sis was coming from. Poor Ry gets all of Nate's hand-me-downs, plays mostly with Nate's friends, and unfortunately I often find myself expecting him to be as smart or as understanding as Nathan is. And now that Nathan is gone all the time he is stuck playing with Annabelle. She is the "baby" and if Ry makes her scream (and she is a screamer), I get upset at him first (sometimes I back up and she gets in trouble, but my natural instinct is that it is his fault). Anyway, I don't want my Ryan to have a complex with this as he grows up.
I hope that I will be able to help him have just as many opportunities as Nathan and Annabelle. He started both preschool and gymnastics this past week and loves both. I try to make sure that I am just as excited to hear about his day as I am about Nathan's. And I try to play cars with him as much as I play dolls with Annie. I love reading books or playing games or puzzles with Ryan, he is really sweet when it is just him and me. Sometimes I wonder if he notices my hard work at trying to make him happier and feel special, cause he is a tough one to please. It just comes more naturally to talk with Nate or play girl stuff with Annie. But I am trying, so here is to my middle child, I love you Ryan!
I hope that I will be able to help him have just as many opportunities as Nathan and Annabelle. He started both preschool and gymnastics this past week and loves both. I try to make sure that I am just as excited to hear about his day as I am about Nathan's. And I try to play cars with him as much as I play dolls with Annie. I love reading books or playing games or puzzles with Ryan, he is really sweet when it is just him and me. Sometimes I wonder if he notices my hard work at trying to make him happier and feel special, cause he is a tough one to please. It just comes more naturally to talk with Nate or play girl stuff with Annie. But I am trying, so here is to my middle child, I love you Ryan!
5 comments:
I am the oldest also. I usually get more attention than my sister too. I did not get it until I had my own children. Ryan is awesome for trying gymnastics!! I am glad that he likes it.
You are an AWESOME Mom, Emily. I don't know any Mom that doesn't struggle to try to "be fair," yet still recognize each child's individual needs and talents. It is a lot of work. I can relate. :)
Tara
I am a middle child, and I totally understand what your sisters are talking about. I think that about Zach though all the time, am I expecting to much, do I get on his case more than the others??? Well I think that we just do the best we can and love them all. They will always know they are loved!! Plus you are a good mom, so no worries!
My latest thought that I am reminding myself a lot is that it's not about treating my children equally, it's about taking care of their needs. Because they are different they will need different levels of attention, love, etc. I am trying to figure out who needs more of what right now.
Emily, It is for sure hard, Amanda used to tell me I love the other kids more, Jordan was my baby girl, Colton was the baby and the only boy and Kylie was the oldest.Things are good with us, but I do find myself having to work a little harder with her. You are a great mom and you are doing the right thing so no worries! I am sure you will do just great!
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